All the Better to See You With

2010 has been a challenge for our little family.

First, we had a new little addition to our family that we lost at 8 weeks, and it was the truly the saddest thing we've ever experienced. But in all of that sadness came amazing reminders of God's love and providence, and I'm so thankful for the family and friends surrounding us who helped us focus on that.

Second, Jim got a new job, and in all of that excitement came a lot of anxiety about what was and is ahead of him with something completely new. But our pastor's series on Philippians kept us focused on the joy, joy, joy, among other things.

And third (there has to be a third, because as Dr. Bob once said, "You know we Presbyterians like things in threes"), there's the uprooting of our family...the moving out of our comfort zone to a new place (even though family is close by) where we'll feel the need to carve out a little space for us and where we'll undoubtedly miss and long for the comforts of the place where we've spent our entire married life and met some of the most loving and gracious people we've ever known. But...

What a blessing to be reminded of the opportunities God grants us to glorify Him! Tonight I was watching that TLC show about the Duggar family, which I'm so thankful has a place on TV, and I heard something that I hope I'll hold fast to for a long time. When speaking of her preemie baby's health issues, Michelle Duggar said, "When situations are difficult, we can choose to be bitter or better." And her words struck a chord with me.

Amid all the tumult of this year, at every turn, we've had to make the decision to be bitter or better. And I will admit that there were times when mourning the loss of our baby that I asked God, "Why?? What did I do to you?" And, truthfully, He could easily have answered, "Plenty." But He didn't. And through His grace and love He allowed me to see Him with new eyes.

Things really have been a challenge thus far, and I know they will continue to be. My prayer is that I'll be better for it all...that I'll open the eyes of my heart and allow God to work in me and through me and accept every circumstance through which He chooses to do that. And not to my glory, of course, but to His.